Dear Friends who are thinking about voting against same-sex marriage:

When you hear or read the “anti” side making comments about gays, replace the word “gay” with my name.


Burrow getting married is a threat to all families.

Burrow cannot be a good parent.

Burrow doesn’t love, it is only lust.

Burrow shouldn’t be allowed to marry.

Burrow is what is wrong with this country.

Burrow is ‘fixable’ with electroshock therapy

If Burrow can marry then we should just let people marry animals.

I hope that this contextualizes the argument for you.

The “gay movement” is simply about people who are in love and want to spend their lives together. Its about a legal recognition and protection of our commitment to our partner.


I hope you’re prepared to give up your Mac computer or Windows systems. Actually, you’ll have to get off facebook, too. And tumblr. You won’t be able to watch Disney movies or go to their parks or buy their toys. Don’t eat any General Mills cereals, drink any Starbucks coffee, or drive Fords….

Long story short Admin #1 in the chatroom called something gay meaning it was stupid.  When I pointed out that this was NOT COOL we got in an argument culminating in this gem from Admin #1:

it’s impossible to argue with irrational ignorance 

which is straight up out of the “How to be a Bully” handbook.  Call the other side irrational.  This is supposed to be a SAFE SPACE FOR TRAUMA SURVIVORS. I did not feel safe especially when my sexuality was slurred and then I was bullied because I was insulted. 

So I sent emails to the other 3 Admins.  Only one replied.

From an email with Admin #2: 

I know Admin #1 very well for years. I am a gay male and she doesn’t ever offend me in any way. I am sure she did not mean to offend you by using the word “gay” with a negative connotation. As you know, many other people in the world do the same thing. The word gay has many meanings: happy, homosexual, and unfortunately stupid. Words are used in other countries for different things. For example in the United Kingdom and Australia the word ”fag” means cigarette. 

My point is that she is not saying your sexuality is stupid or implying
anything along that nature. I am sorry your feelings were hurt in our chat
rooms. We collectively as an administrative team work very hard to keep the
website safe, secure, and welcoming of all members regardless of their
background, race, gender, and sexuality. 

There were many MANY more emails where I was called SEXIST for having called Admin #1 heterosexist. And also told that my definition of heterosexism: 



 Discrimination or prejudice against homosexuals on the assumption that heterosexuality is the norm.

is not in the online dictionaries he looked in.  Well boo fucking hoo.  Apparently this makes it still OK for people to use gay as a slur because of regionalism.

(and signal boost the shit out of this please) 

Talk to me of Survivor spaces.

My current space is not understanding why saying gay = bad is a bad thing.  I’m trying, DEAR LORD I’M TRYING. Contacted all the other admins, on my like 6th email to the guy who emailed me back.

Where do you go to talk to other survivors?

if you have to say, ‘we’re not ALL like that’



then you’re a part of the problem.

Because if you’re a genuine ally, you will not feel the need to inject yourself into an oppressed group’s discussion to make it about you and defend yourself…because there should be nothing in need of defense and you should know it is not about you.